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THE THREE RESOLUTIONS

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THE THREE RESOLUTIONS

Tag Archives: Michael Heppell

Self-publishing. A Case, and a Plea.

11 Wednesday Nov 2020

Posted by threeresolutionsguy in Uncategorized

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Michael Heppell, Police Time Management, self-publishing, The Way, three resolutions, Write That Book Autumn 2020

Let’s be frank. If you search Amazon for a book by subject you will come across some plainly self-published books, and you might wince. I see ‘summaries’ of other writers’ works and ask, “Why not just buy the original!?” Many such books also come across as having only a few pages (with HUGE fonts) and that makes you question the value you’ll get as a purchaser.

However, I have read some very deep, well-written books that have been self-published via Amazon. The quality of the binding is fine if not spectacular, the authors have clearly considered their content and, occasional grammar and spelling goofs aside, they have been a pleasure to read. A good example is Tim Brownson’s “The Clarity Method” (although the © he insists on using for ‘his’ name for a values-based coaching method that has been around for 40 years irks a little.) Another fine book is Unified Power by Charles R. Hobbs and Greg  W. Allison – relatively short, but a deep exploration and description of how the principles of Integrity, (secular) Faith, Love and Purpose underpin our best work. So here’s the case for my efforts.

First of all, my books are 150 to 300+ pages, and I recently amended one because a purchaser said that the 130 pages of The Way had too small a font. It’s now 150 pages. My revision of Police Time Management will be well over 300 in A4, 12-font. MASSIVE. The Three Resolutions is also in a small font and 300 pages long. (Might have to make that bigger for the age-related squint.) In a nutshell, you get lots of paper and words for your buck.

Second, they are original. I’ll rephrase that. While any thought that gave rise to them arose from my own studies and experiences, they aren’t merely summaries of someone else’s efforts with little or no input from me. The Three Resolutions is a broad self-development  philosophy and approach to life based on a three page article by Stephen Covey, and brings broader self-help advice into a three step developmental process or paradigm. Police Time Management takes a lot of what I have learned and applied over 25 years and directs it specifically at policing and at the professional and personal lives of those with whom I was proud to serve. And The Way is a book in which I provide a progressive approach to identifying your own – not mine – approach to a congruent life. Yes, they have derived from my studies, but they aren’t in any way ‘just’ a summary of other works. (I was tempted to amalgamate them into one big book but you’d get a hernia carrying it.)

So they are self-published. I haven’t got a huge company behind me, just a life very much like those of most people. But when you first picked up a book by Sinek, Robbins, Covey or anyone else – did you know or care who they were or did you look at the description and contents page and think, “I must read this”?

Okay, that’s my pitch finished. But what about you?Is there a book in you? Do you have a philosophy, a story to tell, a standpoint that needs to be strongly promoted? Do you want to make a story up? Well – what’s stopping you?

You can write and self-publish at no cost via kdp.amazon.com, like many do. It’s easy and, as in the case of The Way font, you can immediately edit any errors in time for the next order! What’s more you can paperback AND Kindle your book, although there is an art to that.

You may only sell copies to yourself. But here’s the kicker. If you put enough thought and effort into your work you might find, as I did, that your cognitive and reasoning abilities, your understanding of what’s happening around you (and how you’re being played!) and possibly even your IQ, will be enhanced. You’ be better – ‘all round’ better. And you’ll feel a greater sense of self-esteem just for having done the writing.

So I’d ask you to do two things. First, write a book. Second, don’t dismiss a self-published book without at least using the ‘Look Inside’ facility that Amazon provides so that you can get a sense of the content of the book, the author’s style and the effort that was – or wasn’t – put into it.

We amateur wordsmiths thank you for the few minutes you give to us when you do that.

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7 Habits Day 1 of 17 – Paradigms

01 Wednesday Jul 2020

Posted by threeresolutionsguy in Uncategorized

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17, 7 Habits, Michael Heppell, Stephen R Covey", the seven habits of highly effective people

Before he got into the Habits themselves, Stephen Covey laid a foundation, a core set of bases for understanding what was to follow. One of my recent discoveries on my 25th year of study was just how much what mattered at the start, mattered at the finish. And in the part between.

The primary, possibly most powerful tenet of The Seven Habits Philosophy is that of personal responsibility. Make sure you understand that. Everything that we do about what happens to us – is our fault. I should emphasise, given a participant’s interjection that ‘not everything is our fault’ that not everything that happens to us is our fault – the tenet doesn’t say that. It states that what we do about it is our fault.

Which means that when events pressurise upon us, when we want things to change, when we realise we don’t know or understand something, then responsibility for addressing those challenges lies not with Mum, friends, the government or the media. It lies within us. We are responsible.

This is almost too much to bear for some people, and for some vulnerable people it is nigh on impossible. Understanding personal responsibility can be a curse as much as it is liberating, when it comes to judging situations. “Why don’t you just DO something?” is easy for one to say, hard for another to do.

Which brings us to the first idea we have to understand if we are to understand the remainder of the Habits, and life in general. (Incidentally, reading the book will raise your levels of understanding of psychology as well as philosophy.)

The first concept to understand is that of Paradigms. In essence, and to quote Dr Covey, it is summed up in the phrase, “How we see the problem, is the problem.”

Paradigm is based on a Greek word, Paradigma, meaning pattern. If you consider (my understanding of) Gestalt Theory, it means we see and assess things based on a pattern that our experiences have formed. Paradigms are why we pull on some door handles and push on door plates – our experience instantly tells us which we are approaching and we act accordingly. That is at a basic level, but at an advanced level it is why we judge people and situations – our upbringing, state of mind, prior experience and judgements all inform us and we usually assess and act without further thought.

In demonstrations, Covey asks half of his audience to look at a picture of a woman’s face while the remainder close their eyes. Then the audience changes places and he shows a picture of a saxophone player. Then the pictures close and all open their eyes. Then a third picture is shown, which to those in the know is a composite, a drawing utilising the same line structure but slightly changed detail, and the audience is asked to discuss. Half insist it is a girl, the other half a saxophonist. Debate takes place an eventually all see both.

This is where it gets interesting. Think on the idea that how we see things influences what we do about it, and that our past experience influences how we see things. This has two effects.

First,  if we see things differently from others, we act differently and if we see the wrong thing, we do the wrong thing. That is not too sinister. But secondly, we can be directed to see things a certain way – and therefore act as we have been ‘told’ to see.

What does this mean?

It means that it does not take long, or very much, to direct people’s thinking.

Advertisers do it. We know that. But the media does it, too. How often have you been told that ‘outrage’ has been caused by something a politician has done, when if you were to step away from being told that you are outraged to realise that only the Opposition has ‘been outraged’ – surprise – and what has happened is really quite insignificant. But the media primes the reader to be angered using adjective and adverb to exaggerate factual content.

Not only is it true that “How you see the problem is the problem,” but “How you are told to see the problem can cause problems.”

A lot of people I speak to are quite defensive when I speak of the 7 Habits. What I find from what they say is they haven’t a clue what they’re defensive about – but their experiences and paradigms are telling them that this is religion/psychobabble/not relevant/I’m nuts.

In essence, understanding Paradigms lets us ask ourselves several question about our issues, challenges and problems. They are:

  • “How do you see yours?”
  • “Am I seeing the situation correctly?”
  • “Does it really matter? And
  • “What am I going to do about it? If anything.”

Tomorrow we’ll look at the Personality and Character Ethic, and how even that influences how we see and act.

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Seven Habits Review: Day 0. Introduction.

30 Tuesday Jun 2020

Posted by threeresolutionsguy in Character and Competence, Discipline, General, Purpose and Service, Rants, Time Management, Uncategorized

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17 Days, 7 Habits, leadership, management, Michael Heppell, self leadership, seven habits

I have written before about how many people confuse The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People with being a business book. It isn’t, never was. What it is, is a book about living effectively as an individual and as part of any relationship. It is not about fame or success, per se, but about living a principled life, which in turn can lead to those things – if they are what you want. But let’s be frank – most of us don’t want them or don’t see them as important as being a good person doing good work for the people they care about, while enjoying life – which this book promotes in spades.

I recall once attending a meeting of personal development teachers preparing to deliver the Seven Habits material to schools with the overall aim of teaching ‘leadership’, and I opined that what we would be teaching was  self-leadership, and this was even more important because while everyone has the potential to be ‘a success’ and a ‘boss’ the vast majority of young people would be the staff, the workers, the led – and they should be trained to be the best they could be at those things, too. Leaders – self-leaders – make great followers.

The Seven Habits are (and I quote) A principle-centred, character-based, inside-out approach to personal and interpersonal effectiveness.

Let’s break that down a bit.

Principle-Centred. We like to think we can control events, but while we can control what we do, principles (sciences, incontrovertible truths, systems) decide the results. I’ll get deeper into that in future articles but for now I’ll explain that it means that instead of letting fame, wealth, family, church, peers, friends, pleasure, friends, enemies or work dictate how we think and behave, we let principles lead our decisions and resulting actions.

Character-Based. Our personality is what we show other people deliberately, but our character is what we really are. Personality tends to make us follow fashions and popular thought and ‘the latest thing’ so that we can fit in and benefit from that fitting in. Character, on the other hand, requires sacrifice, work and effort. But it lasts well beyond fashion, fame and money.

Inside-Out Approach. There is a tendency for folks to wait for their external world to change so that it suits them, instead of either changing it for the better themselves by changing their approach towards the changes needed. In 2020 we see protest after protest of people demanding other people change to suit their agenda – then they go home and wait for it to happen instead of engaging those in power in an effort to persuade and influence the change they want. The Inside-Out Approach is about looking into yourself and deciding what you need to change in yourself and how you need to change your approach, in order to achieve what you seek. Waiting for ‘them’ to change is ineffective.

Personal and Interpersonal Effectiveness. Effectiveness is not ‘just ‘success. Effectiveness is getting the results you want in such a way as to get them consistently – not once, but as long as they are needed. And it is not just about ‘you’ – it’s about effectiveness with and through other people, too. I have often said ‘Everything we do, we do with, for or because of other people – everything.’ So relationships are important enough to pursue with diligence. Including those we have with ourselves.

The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People, then, are about taking responsibility for making things happen for the benefit of all those you love or serve, including yourself, while acting with good character and respecting the realities of the world.

Over the next 17 days (long story*) I intend to expand upon Stephen Covey’s work with a view to encouraging any reader to take up their own study of The Seven Habits so that they can benefit, as I have, from a better self-understanding and an improved recognition of what is going on around them, how they can respond to the challenges of the modern world – and do so without offending or being offended.

A word of warning, though – as you understand the lessons Covey taught you will start to recognise how many people are trying to tell you how to live. Covey’s main lesson is that you have that choice and it need not be imposed upon you. Reading the book will make you aware of how the world is trying to condition you – not necessarily out of malice but out of a desire to make you agree with ‘them’. After reading it, you may still agree with ‘them’. But it will be a conscious rather than popular agreement.

In the end, a major tenet of this book is this.

You can live your life or your life can be lived for you.

I hope you enjoy the work to follow.

 

(* Michael Heppell, personal development coach, has proposed a 17 day project for his Facebook Group and this is mine. That wasn’t as long a story as I thought.)

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Anything you can do, I MUST do better!

12 Sunday Jul 2015

Posted by threeresolutionsguy in Character and Competence

≈ Comments Off on Anything you can do, I MUST do better!

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Michael Heppell, Ruseell Tiley, second resolution, three resolutions, tony robbins

“When you choose your fields of labour, go where nobody else is willing to go.” Mary Lyon

Is a quote I wish I’d known about years ago. Occasionally, history shows I stepped up to the mark a bit and went a bit further than others may have done. Now and then I exhibited an attitude, some effort and greater knowledge about something that made me look a lot better than perhaps I was, and certainly better than a ‘routine’ me tended to be.

In 2003 I met a new boss, and he was the epitome of dedication, character and competence. I’d had some great bosses who were enthusiastic, caring, compassionate and who were great to work for, but in some ways this chap was one step above them in many ways. It may be, in the cold light of ‘now’, that he was only that one step higher up the stairway to perfection than the others, but that’s the point.

Tony Robbins speaks of the ‘two-percenters’, who only have to put out a little more effort, or more considered effort, to be seen as outstanding. Another fellow (Michael Heppell) illustrates this in his books when he supports Robbins’ contention that to get outstanding results you only have to be that little bit better at creating them than those around you. Remember – the Olympic Gold Medallist is usually only centimetres ahead of the next guy, but who can remember the guy who came second. (Which is a shame but it illustrates my point nicely.)

Albert E Gray is often quoted when he says, “A successful person has the propensity for doing the things failures don’t like to do. They don’t like doing them either, necessarily– but their dislike is subordinated to the strength of their purpose.” In addition to doing better than the next person, they’re also willing to do the things that the next person would rather not do, or delegate to someone else, or defer it to when it suits (in the hope it’s never needed).

Thjis manager was exactly like that. He did the work, and he knew his stuff better than anyone I knew. But he also knew better ways of doing it, or how to find the better ways. He was, without question, a master craftsman – and a thoroughly nice bloke.

The Second Resolution is a commitment to being a person of character and a person who is competent. The person who is competent is the guy who comes second. It is the guy with character, with the ability to do more than is called for, for the better reasons, and even when s/he doesn’t want to do – it that comes ahead of the rest.

I wish it as me……

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